Perhaps....... (tabat) wrote in tabats,
Perhaps.......
tabat
tabats

yardstick

What influence does one have on others? What influence does one have on oneself? Does it really matter? All that matters is acceptance of what is. As for every thing you see around you, other beings, situations, etcetera.... is nothing but a reflection of oneself. The self is layered and multifaceted. Through out this day, as I observe others and what I see around me, I have been asking myself "what part of me does this thing or person represent? What is it trying to tell me?" As I come to that understanding it seems hard for me to hate, yet in the depths are hidden shadows that still fester hate. Hate to anything is just a hate to oneself. But it seems to me that one must fully explore hate to fully explore love. One must grasp hate to grasp love, one must grasp love to grasp hate. This is nothing but a yardstick to breach the gap within. The stronger the light the deeper the shadow I use to say a lot, and I still do. It seems to me on my exploration of the light and dark on the outside world I have also explored the light and dark within. And everyone, everything I have encountered has been nothing but a tool for me to come to grasp of what I am. So does that mean all the rapes, abuses, and other disrespects done to me are for a reason? Perhaps. Perhaps. But it is still difficult for me to over come those situations and heal. But the healing is there; and the more I come to the grey caress of twilight in my vastness inside of light and dark, the more forgiveness I have for what was done and the more balance of the answer to why I become. And in this grayness, this twilight within, I can see more and more of the vastness of the light and dark. I have explored both extremes and have come back round. Nothing but a full circle in the expansion and contraction of the heartbeat. I remember when I was a youth I told myself I would experience almost everything at least once to say when I die that I truly lived. It is a blessing and a curse. What is a curse but a blessing in disguise? What is a blessing but a curse in disguise? Everything has an opposite, a shadow. One just needs to know about all facets to fully understand. And as for death….. This vessel, this body I am now in may cease and break down to its elements; but as for Me, I will never die. I never have and never will. Time is nothing but an illusion.
"Adjust the brain and you will see" a friend has told me. Ponder that for a while. "Adjust the brain and you will see”......
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